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2000-05-10 OK, so it's been three days now and I'm still umbillically attached to the monitor. I'm a CRT radiation addict. Maybe I really don't have a life. Uh-oh! No one's supposed to know that! [grin] Maybe I'm just unclear on this "vacation" concept. As I wrote to a friend at work, yes, I'm on vacation. That means mostly that I'm allowed to sit all day in front of the computer in my pajamas, rather than in some clothes that don't scare people on the train. Well, clothes that don't scare them much, anyway. I'm still waiting for my inner genius to come back. So far all my inner genius has come up with is "I really like Websurfing" and "Damn, there were some hotties at Burning Man, weren't there?" Maybe next week I'll become more cerebral. I've never had two weeks to (more-or-less) myself before. I was unemployed for a month or so before I started doing this Web gig, but that hardly counts. And it was four years ago. I don't know quite what to do with myself. I gave the kitchen and bathroom both good scrubs yesterday. Like, serious scrubs. Like a 3PM-10PM scrubing. Though I need to go back and finish the stove and fridge; at least they're clean superficially. And these are the feel-good Naughts, right? The superficial is all that matters, isn't it? "Lessee...is the kitchen floor dry enough to go get another cup of coffee? Never mind, I'll just climb the wall over to it..." The Boyfriend has been trying to inspire me to get out of the house. He warned me to avoid that "Vacation's ending and I haven't done anything" feeling that would set in next Thursday if I didn't get out of the house some. I had an attack of that this morning, so I think I may need to leave my chair after all. Is it just apathy that keeps me seated here? Or am I actually afraid to go to the grocery store, for gods sake? I made a full list of things to do while I have some time. I'm beginning to run out of things that don't involve leaving the house. What stops me? Habit? Phobia? Ennui? Anxiety? At least I don't feel like throwing up in public. Much. Well, I can always pull the famous Web Design trick: When in doubt on what to do next, redesign. _Casey
2003-03-29 - Moving Notice |
